it rained today

Melancholy you return to me.
oh welcome back,my little hurt
Lying around these distant days
Feeling fashionable
decadent in this quiet sad.
Like a gift to myself, these lonesome hours
I tell myself that I want it this way
Wouldn’t let go of the lump in my throat even if I could
Choosing instead to wear it in the evenings

My accessory, my truth my antique broach

Convinced that tears thicken my skin
And that smiles will only deepen these false laugh lines

This feeling i could rely on
I could expect it every time I needed it
Like I thought I wanted it.
Even went so far as to look forward to it

Because it was always there,
I could always count on its return.
Everything else was
so temporary,
so changing
at the mercy of unpredictable events.
but with this i knew
that every year I was there for it
as it was there for me.

Because winter’s suit fits me like a glove.
and Holds me like I need it to


it’s comforting
to know I can still feel this way
To know
my waters run deeper then the pools
I chose to wade in

but...
I now fear my love
my love for sad is a love that may be fleeting
Because although this pale skin is
quite becoming
And that I could
get used to this milky hue


I am certain now
That I would
shed every flake
For one morning in your warmth

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